Nothing Comes Easy!

Don’t you just get excited about those stories that you hear on the morning talk shows about those people who did something amazing?  Shows like the “Biggest Loser” and “The Amazing Race” are so popular because people achieve things that seem impossible.  We all wish we could achieve things that seem impossible.

We all have things in our lives that seem impossible.  Maybe right now you are out of a job and the chances of you getting one you want seem impossible.  Or perhaps you started a business and  it just seems like success is way out of your reach.  Have you been struggling with a weight problem or addiction and it just seems like you will never overcome?  What is the difference between you and the people we see on T.V.?  What makes them so special, why to they achieve the goal?  I have learned that the difference is that they DECIDED they were going to achieve their goal.  That’s right, in many cases a decision is what stands between you and achievement.  The people who reach their goals give themselves no other options, they make a decision to achieve.  They count the cost and they decide it is worth the effort.

The decision does not make the goal any easier.  The same obstacles are still there, you still have to do what it takes each day to get the job done.  The difference is that once you make the DECISION the exit doors have been closed.

So what are the things that you want to achieve today?.  Are they really hard?  Are you up for the challenge?  Can you make the decision?  All those folks we see on the morning shows faced many obstacles, got up early, hit the gym, ran the race, talked to one more person, what ever their goal required.  They sweat, they cried, and felt like quitting, but they got up every morning because they decided to do so.  And one day they woke up and they had achieved their goal.  What will you wake up to tomorrow?  Wake up a winner!

Are You Thankful for Anything Today?

In the midst of all the things that go on in a day, I hear a lot of grumbling.  And I know that right now we all have a lot to grumble about.  No jobs, house foreclosures, 401k is tanking,  price of gas, bad bosses, bad jobs you can’t leave right now, family problems, and on it goes.  We all have lots to grumble about.

But many of us still have some good things going on in our lives.  Can you identify the good things going on right now?  Are you more or less healthy, or at least not seeing a doctor?  Are you kids doing well in school?  Do you have a job?  Is the sun shining where you are right now?  Are you reading a good book?  Did you enjoy a great movie lately or even a TV show?  Did you enjoy a great cup of coffee this morning?  Is there something going on in your world right now that makes you smile, even slightly.  If so, then focus on those few things that do make you happy.  Remember that life is about change and many of the things that are going wrong right now will eventually go better in the future.

So why is being thankful so important?  It really is hard to be down when you are thinking of things you are thankful for, it kind of preoccupies your mind with positive thoughts.  Being grateful really helps you to focus on good things and thus takes the focus off the things that pull you down.

If you can’t find something to be thankful for, then perhaps it is time to seek some help.  Often, if we are clinically depressed, seeing good things is really hard and you need help from a physician with that.  If you are not depressed, but feel you can’t find your way out of a problem, seek the help of a friend or a coach to help bring you through the problem.  But if you are just down because everyone is down, do yourself a favor and look for some things to smile about, it will help pick you up just a little.  There are still things to smile about, you just have to start looking for them.

Time Can Be On Your Side

With all of the time management systems, tools, gadgets and gimmicks out there we should be the most accomplished people on the planet.  I hardly meet anyone ever that does not have some type of time management system strapped to his waste or in her hand bag.  We have access to more “stuff” to help us organize and manage our time.  And yet we run late, work late into the night, spend 60 – 70 hours of our week at work, and many of us leave work with lots of work undone.  So how do we make time our friend.

I think time management starts with our goals.  Ask yourself how much of what you do every day puts you closer to your goals?  Do you have goals and plans as to how you will achieve them?  Most of us wonder through life letting the activities of life buffet us from home, to work, to soccer/hockey/tennis/football/baseball practice, to home again without having any of these activities push us closer to any goals.  This is true because most of us don’t bother to set goals, we just get up each day and let other tell us how we will use our time.

If you lay your head down and night and wonder “is this all there is” chances are you have never explored your own values and determined a purpose for you life and just as important you have not set goals.  If you have set goals you have not put any thought into how to make them happen.

Life can be so much more abundant, but it starts with figuring out what that abundance looks like for you.  Take some time to think about what you really want out of life and then think about what it takes to get there.  You may have to give up some stuff to make your dreams happen, but that is how goals are realized and life becomes more satisfying.

Stop lamenting that you are not where you want to be, and start planning the trip!

Make Up Your Mind – Be Happy!

As many writers of old, from the Bible to modern day motivators have suggested “we become what we think about.” President Lincoln said “Most folks are as happy as they make up their minds to be”, indicating that happiness comes first from our minds. We all know people on both sides of the happiness aisle, those whose happiness is infectious, that leave us happy whenever we associate with them. And sadly we all have those in our lives we would rather avoid because they just bring us down. So on which side of the aisle do you sit?

Do you ever wonder what it is inside of those perpetually happy or contented people that makes them that way. Is it as simple as they “decide” to be happy? When I think of perpetual contentedness with life, I need only look into the faces of my dogs. I often wish for their innate ability to just be happy. They are thrilled with life from the moment they wake up in the morning to the moment they fall asleep at night. They actually make me happy just by being in the same room with me. They are contented to follow me around, wagging their tails happily at the prospect of a new adventure or a familiar event. Oh to be so blissfully unaware that we are fighting a war in Iraq, the economy is headed for recession, our retirement is shrinking and we will have to buy a cheaper brand of dog food, people hate each other and on it goes. They only know that life here in our corner of the world is good, they are warm and well-fed and although they don’t know exactly when the next walk will come, they are confident that one is indeed on the way.

Granted our lives will never be as simple as that of our beloved pets, and we will never really know the same bliss of ignorance that they experience, we can cultivate some habits in our lives that can help us to be as “happy as we make up our minds to be“.

Here are some simple actions, that when applied can help all of us develop a more happy and contented attitude in life.

1. Remove negative input from your life. This is difficult I will admit, but many successful people go through life living by this credo. Since I am news junky this is particularly hard for me, but I have adapted the idea that I can hear news each day but not dwell on it and should not repeat bad news to everyone I meet. Other happy people just avoid negative news reports, newspapers, blogs, and other media altogether, choosing to read and dwell on much more positive literature and media. If we are able, at least to a practical degree, rid ourselves of daily negative input, this will go a long way in helping us live a little happier.

2. Dwell on the positive. Not only do we not allow negative thoughts, ideas and speech to enter our minds, dwelling on positive thoughts and ideas can lead to a more peaceful, contented mindset. Many like to listen to uplifting music, read positive books, and the like to keep their minds focused on positive thoughts and this keeps them in a positive frame of mind.

3. Setting goals in our lives can give us something to fix our minds on. In this way we allow ourselves to concentrate on what we can control and therefore not let life “just happen” to us.

4. Become others-centered. If we spend most of our time trying to help others we have less time to look inwardly and dwell on the negative around us. Losing one’s self in the service of others is a formula for happiness, we always get more than we give if we pursue happiness in this manner.

5. Be generous with others. Being generous can take on the form of physically giving things to others in need or it can mean being generous in our expectations of others. Always expect the best from others, and always give them the benefit of the doubt.

6. Work hard. Satisfaction can be found in work and fulfillment can be found is always doing your best or better to whatever work one pursues. Doing more than expected does not just benefit those for whom we work. It gives us back, in satisfaction, far more than our employer gains in productivity.

7. Find hope in faith. Not everyone considers themselves a person-of-faith, and those people who do not are by no means doomed to a life of sadness and despair. However, I find that my faith in God, and His planned purpose for my life, does make me a much happier person. It gives me a reason to get up and keep going when the inevitable negative events happen in life. My faith is the positive place I go to escape the realities of a harsh world. It provides me with positive thoughts and ideas with which to fill my mind instead of the negative news all around me. It blesses me with positive relationships in which to find shelter. I find my relationship with God gives me a shelter in which, like my dogs, I can find blissful ignorance of the fragility of my life.

There are probably many other ways one can employ to help us “make up our minds to be happy”, but these are just a few simple things than can keep us focused on happiness.

Every minute of life is not meant to be filled with happiness, but rather the events of our individual lives are meant to be underscored by happiness. I can be in the middle of a crises in my life, but it can be lessened by the positive view I choose to take of my life overall. What is you outlook on life, could it use a new perspective?